The feeling of social connectedness and support has been shown to improve health on all levels, protecting against depression, counteracting cognitive decline, and improving physical health. However, dating, friendships, and relationships can be a tricky subject to navigate at the best of times. For autistic adults, these things can be even more challenging.

While some happily make use of internet forums and online dating or friendship sites, others may feel uncomfortable with this type of interaction due to the possibility of misunderstandings and the lack of real, authentic conversation.

A shared interest may provide an alternative opportunity to find like-minded people. Make a list of things you like to do, and then decide if you would like to do any of them with a companion. Once you have identified possible activities, search online for groups who share your interest. The website meetup.com is a good place to start, offering a wide variety of groups, including book and film clubs, Sci-Fi, spy games, hiking, philosophy, cooking, writing, music, and much more. You can also easily set up your own special interest group if it doesn’t already exist in your area. Another safe way to meet people can be attending evening classes at your local Community College, where you will have the benefit of an experienced tutor who can provide structure to the activity and make sure everyone gets to be involved.

In some areas, Autism New Zealand holds adult social groups, which are casual get-togethers providing an opportunity to share stories and meet others. We have had several people make new friends in these get-togethers and form their own private groups as a result. We can also refer to existing social networks within regions.

This is due to a range of issues. The recruitment process often does not play to autistic strengths due to communication differences, pre-conceptions that employers may have about autism, and the lack of confidence or the anxiety that an autistic person may have after previous knockbacks.

Autism New Zealand offers a range of Employment Support and Transition programmes in the Auckland and Wellington regions. For more information click here.

If you are outside of Auckland or Wellington, other supported employment organisations may be able to assist. You can find these online by doing a search for supported employment agencies and the name of the area that you live. You can also contact your Autism New Zealand branch for knowledge about what’s available in your community.

Your local WINZ office is the first point of contact for financial support. You may be eligible for a range of payments and allowances, including:

• Disability Allowance (which can include financial support to access counselling and cover other medical expenses)
• Supported Living Payment (which is meant to cover your living expenses, but does not oblige you to look for work or have frequent meetings with your case worker)
• Accommodation Supplement (which helps with paying for rent or board) 

Extra supports – Needs Assessment and Service Coordination (NASC)

As of April 2014, people with a formal autism diagnosis are eligible to access the full range of disability support services. One of the most useful of these for autistic adults may be Individualised Funding (IF), which is intended to give eligible people more choice in how they are supported, allowing you to employ your own support workers and giving you a say in how your supports should be used. Individualised Funding and most other disability support services are accessed through a Needs Assessment and Service Coordination (NASC) agency.

They will conduct a needs assessment to determine what kind of services you can receive, and they also refer people to appropriate service providers and manage payments.

For a more detailed description of the Needs Assessment and Services Coordination (NASC) and other supports, please refer to the Ministry of Health website.

According to the 5th edition of the diagnostic and statistical manual (DSM-5)*, about 70% of autistic people have one co-occurring mental health condition, and 40% may have two or more co-occurring mental health conditions. Depression and anxiety are the most common given the painful environmental experiences autistic people may experience. Heightened sensitivity, bullying, loneliness, and different neurological structures can all contribute to being more vulnerable to mental health conditions.

Only a qualified medical professional can make a diagnosis and initiate treatment, but online self-tests for depression and anxiety can help you decide whether or not you should raise the question with your GP.

Once you have a diagnosis, Work and Income (WINZ) may be able to help pay for counselling or medication if necessary.

If you already have a diagnosis or are on medication but feel no improvement, bring this up with your psychologist, psychiatrist or doctor as they might want to revise your support strategy.

Physical health

Physical self-care can be challenging for autistic adults because of motor or sensory difficulties.

Physical activity:

Sensory difficulties, social anxiety, or fine motor difficulties can make it daunting for autistic people to exercise in common settings such as the gym, group fitness or yoga classes. These options often present other obstacles making them inaccessible.

Physical activity is important for good health, the most important thing is to find something that you enjoy, provides routine and can easily be incorporated in to your lifestyle.

Other options you could try include following online workouts, walking instead of driving, or using public transport, or movement based video games.

Sleep:

Sleep difficulties are common for autistic people. A good quality sleep is essential for everyone’s health and well-being.

Ways to improve your sleep might include establishing a routine such as having a bath and going to bed at the same time each night. Other tips include using a weighted blanket, staying away from screens, and avoiding caffeine and alcohol.

Healthy eating:

Sensory issues may limit the range of food options therefore it is important to find alternative ways to have a varied and balanced diet. You could try experimenting with changing the texture of food or disguising flavours with something you like.

If you are trying to avoid a particular food or need to reduce your intake, it’s a good idea to replace it with a healthy alternative, as the food item may be part of a routine and often can’t just be dropped without a replacement.

It’s important to always consult with a qualified nutritionist before making any drastic changes to your diet.

*American Psychiatrist Association. (2013). Diagnostic and statistical manual of mental disorders. (5th ed.). Arlington VA: Author.